I made it to the Qatar v Japan World Cup qualifying match last night and it was yet another bizarre Qatari experience!
We set of to the ground (we finally found out where it was at from a colleague as the match wasn't advertised at all!) and encountered the usual match day traffic, or maybe it was just rush hour Doha. Anyway, the usual Qatari mayhem and dicing with death on the roads and we got parked about 10 minutes walk from the ground - this is obviously the sensible English way to do it. Unlike all the locals who were insistent they could pile their landcruisers in as close as the lazy gits could get them to the stadium - one even pulled up outside the stadium, up onto the path and just left it there in full view of what few police were there!
We found the ticket office which had every booth manned only to be told just to go in anyway. So there were some people with tickets and some without, although they did seem to vet who came in as there wasn't one Indian to be seen in there! The trouble with free seating is that is causes mayhem inside as people try and scramble for a seat, something which a nation born to chaos find very easy to screw up completely!
Eventually we found a few of the remaining seats just as the local marching band came onto the pitch...bagpipes the lot! For some reason all the Brits found this hilarious, it was like going back 30 years to an English cup final!!!
The Al Saad Stadium itself is described on it's website as "A perfect replica of Old Trafford"...well unless Old Trafford has been bombed, rebuilt to look like a cheap version of a 3rd Division ground then I don't think it is. In true Qatari style, the stadium looks quite good on the face of things but you soon realise on closer inspection that it ain't (and never will be) finished!
On the concourse there was about 50 or so locals on the prayer mats (Qatar flags) giving it the big 'un towards Mecca...this divine intervention must surely mean they were going to win...err...no.
The mass off white dish dashes and Qatari flag waving made a good spectacle as the game kicked off, they actually appeared to be showing some spirit and passion for a change. Neither team got to grips with the game in the first 15 minutes, but it wasn't a bad affair with both teams putting in a bit of effort where they lacked in skill. Although I don't think I've seen any more theatrical diving and rolling about than that witnessed last night by the Japs! Really surprised me too as I thought they'd be above all that.
Unfortunately in true Qatari style...15 minutes attention span was up and that was it, all the supporters started getting out the ipods, mobile phones and obligatory cigarettes! They were obviously bored, while the away contingency continued there relentless chanting and banging of drums.
The boredom spread to the pitch and the Japanese got their first via some dodgy defending and through the keepers legs - a most unlikely looking 'Qatari' keeper, 6'4" and obviously African - like most of the team it would appear - looks like they've gone for the Jack Charlton citizenship approach - i.e. We can make you a Qatari no problem!
Half time and all the Qatari support stood up and milled around for a bit, although 15 minutes break still wasn't enough for them to get back to their seats in time - what do they do at half time? Go to the bookies...err no...go for a pint...err...no...bacon sandwich...errr no?
A quick goal in the 2nd half from Japan and it was pretty much over from there on in. The most comedy moment was still yet to come though.
On about 65 minutes the Japs got the third and literally as one, just about all of the home support stood up and left!!! Unbelievable, talk about loyal support!
Even better followed, as the ones who had stayed behind formed a line of white around the edges of the pitch. We thought they were going to go on a pitch invasion... but no.....as one they held each other hands and turned their back to the pitch (see pics!) and refused to watch any more of the game!!!! They stayed like that until full time, very very bizarre!
Full time...Qatar 0 Japan 3, fairly moderate game with little skill, but entertaining enough.
Answer....to hide them all from the Prime Minister!!!!
Following their departure from
Both Wilson the younger and Wilson the senior (The Bairn - current average age of 47), are settling in well.
The Bairn has also confessed his recent passion for finger puppets, in particular the legendary Fingermouse!
Within minutes of suggesting a BBQ with Pig based goodies the wrath of Allah was unleashed on the desert plains of Qatar.
Witnesses were treated to the sight of 2 fantastic Twisters starting somewhere in the vicinity of the camp effleunt treatment plant. If there was a direct hit I'd hate to be involved in that clean up operation.
Next the deafening thunder kicked in then the heavens opened. It looks like some employees will be having a bath today whether they wanted to or not!!! I just hope my porta cabin is water tight.
The evening began with a few chums gathering for cheese and some of the world's finest ales. During which a veritable plethora of cultural and intellectual media was displayed upon the B-8 cabin wall - Little Britain, Star Wars, Family guy and even Boro Pat made an appearance.
The night concluded with a showing of the Champions League broadcast live from.....errrr....Hong Kong?
As patrons of the B1 Sports Bar made their way home, it was Bairnard who decided to destroy his toilet seat, the attached aerial photo shows the new XXL toilet seat being readied for shipping to Qatar.
In a shock revelation from the PPE department, it appears that old Mr Bairnard has increased in girth after only a few days of double ice-creams.
No....
RAIN! WTF!!!!!
One huge cloud had appeared during the night along with a little bit of lightening, and then as soon as the sun rose it was fried into oblivion!
Current temperature outside the office....a paltry 48C! Winter is on it's way at last!
Long Live The Kangasaurus Rex...RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARR!
0 comments Posted by Monkeehanger at 6:16 AM
After 37 days in the desert the Not So Angry Commissioning Engineer is starting to pine for a few clouds and a green tree, perhaps even a little light drizzle.
At least the dust has settled a little bit for a few days, but up to 46C today.
We'd heard that costs were being cut, but first the Bairn's flight replaced with a catapult and now it looks like there's a new route from Sudbury to Ras Laffan!
Also, another surprise guest was found in one of the underground lines! Graduates...ask your parents!
The Bairn was unavailable for comment, but many are hoping that he will rise to the challenge as he is hurtled through the stratosphere via the gargantuan trebuchet!
Perhaps he will do it for charity said one colleague of the local boob.
This blogger for one, hopes that it comes true.
Above, how the Bairn would look if he were to perform the feat...
Actually said on site today...
"It's like the cast of f**king Cocoon round here!"
and
Process Engineer - "Why is that pipeline so long?"
Construction "Because if it was any shorter it wouldn't reach..."
Ha ha....
Seemed like a nice idea to enjoy the British sunshine on a Thursday afternoon with a trip to the post office. As usual it was pissing down so we sat inside. The first pint went down a treat so I asked if people would like a second. Some accepted. The Bairn, much to everyone's shock, disguct and horror, asked for a half.
I demanded that he drink his half from the glass provided but the youngster hid his embarrasing choice of drink by topping up his as yet unfinished 1st pint (another school girl error!!). Anyway, as he has a bladder the size of an acorn I waited until he went to the toilet, refilled the half pint glass and returned the empties to the bar staff like a good patron.
See Bairn drink. Drink Bairn drink.
Found this on my laptop and couldn't resist posting it! Ahhh happy days in the Rayners!
Finally arrived in Doha after an arduous journey around the world! Set off from Teesside Airport for Amsterdam only to find that the Amsterdam to Doha flight had been cancelled by the kind people over at KLM! After a little bit of haggling they let me onto the Dubai flight...near enough I guess.
The KLM flight was a nice shiny new 777 with a cracking entertainment system on board, so no problems wasting 7 hours!
Landed in Dubai for the first time woooooaaahhh big, big airport with lots and lots of places to spend cash!
1am local time and the airport is crowded!
Managed to fit in a quick Thai (meal before anyone asks!) and then flight three from Dubai to Doha.
This was with Emirates and was only a 45 minute flight, yet they managed to serve drinks and a meal before we landed in Doha. Again , a good standard of plane even for only a short hop.
Arrived at Doha at 02:40, we left Dubai at 02:30, but apparently the clocks changed in Dubai, they didn't change in Qatar though, so I still can't work out how it took only 10 minutes for a 45 minute flight....confused...I was.
Anyway on with the story....straight through immigration no problems, although being European is certainly a bonus.
Some of the other various nationalities were given a bit of a rough time by the officials and were carted off to who know's where!
Went to collect my luggage and was told by a very polite Emirates man that my case was still in Amsterdam, apparently it's having a bit of a heavy night on the cannabis and may be along tomorrow after a tour of the red light district!
By this time it's 0400 and I'm the last man out of Doha airport, except for the lonely Phillipino driver looking hopefully as I trundled through arrivals!
Into the balmy Doha night (34C at night!) and finally into the Intercontinental Doha and bed for 0500.
The worrying thing was though, that there was absolutely no contact from JK when I arrived, so I was left to wonder what the next day would bring!
...to be continued...
Departure for Qatar is now 10 days and counting, so what better way to start the departure celebrations than a 3 hour session at Lucky Voice.
Bairnard provide star vocals with Mr Brightside and Don't Look Back Into The Sun, vocals of a different kind were provided by Wilsonovic with a helping hand from Big Jock McCock (See Picture).
The big event of the week is tomorrow commencing at 4pm, unless ageing rookie Bairnard bottles it and joins us at 7pm.